Patience for parents

In my 20 years as an admissions professional, I’ve become more patient with the parents in the admissions process. I expect much of this has to do with the fact that my oldest daughter is in grade 11, and I will soon become one of those parents.

I have turned that anger at the parent who opens the decision letter before the student into a greater understanding of the action. I now have a better understanding of the parents' need to protect their children from disappointment as they have gotten used to doing.

So when does that need for shielding the student from disappointment end? When does it become the responsibility of the student to accept and deal with rejection? Counselling professionals struggle with these questions every day. Every encounter we have with a family is an opportunity to educate them toward greater independence for the students. This independence will only provide students with the skills necessary to cope with issues on campus. After all, they do come to campus without their parents.

As one of those parents, I’ve learned these are acts of love that are done without realizing the harm being done to the students. Let’s keep working together through this complex journey of postsecondary admissions!

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