Scared stiff? Doubt it. According to the Book of Lists, Americans’ number one fear isn’t snakes, flying, claustrophobia, or even death. What makes people shake in their designer boots? Their fears of public speaking.
Till Kahrs and Doug Jeffreys of Publicspeakingskills.com like
to joke, "people would actually rather be in the coffin than give the eulogy.”
But with a few secrets to success, you can be on your way to effective speech making and finding the confidence to tackle life’s challenges.
Secret #1: Face the fear
"But, I…I…I…don't wanna speak," you say. Sure you do! You're just scared--and that's OK! So is everyone else. But why are we all so afraid?
"We as humans are all somewhat insecure, and when
you stand up in front of people it amplifies all our insecurities," says Kahrs, co-founder of Publicspeakingskills.com in California.
Doug Jeffreys, co-founder of Publicspeakingskills.com in Pennsylvania, attributes anxiety to visual overload. When we get up to speak, he says, "we are met with a whole bunch of visual stimuli. Your brain is keeping track of all these threats ... We'll look here and we'll look there and try to scan in the whole room, and this really increases one's anxiety level by creating over-stimulation of the brain."
Of course, bad experiences as a child don't help. If your fellow third graders laughed when your mom strapped a huge pouch on you for your marsupial presentation, or your multimedia project for music class went haywire and you had to sing a capella, or no one in the whole student body laughed at your well-prepared jokes, you might hesitate to step up to the microphone again.
Secret #2: Fear makes you look funny
Insecurities, bad memories and a visual overload cause anxiety to grow. "That nervousness needs to come out. It's like steam in a boiling pot, and if you don't know how to let the steam out of the pot correctly, you look really nervous," says Kahrs, who also authored iUniverse's Enhancing Your Presentation Skills.
You mumble, talk in monotone, speak really really fast, repeat the same gestures, twitch your thumbs, flip back your hair, or create nonwords like 'uh' and 'um.'
Kahrs and Jeffreys look at this nervous rush positively.
"Hey, you've got steam in the pot–that's fuel for the energy to make you look good. Use that fuel or use that steam productively to raise your voice, raise your volume, use voice inflections, use gestures," Kahrs suggests.
Secret #3: It’s not what you say, but how ...
So, what's the big deal if
you look nervous? Not only will you make your job harder, you'll distract the audience and lose impact.
Betty Saunders, public-speaking instructor at Monroe Community College, Toastmaster member and motivational speaker, suggests developing your speaking image in four ways:
1. Your Attitude: Monitor your "self-talk" by giving yourself positive thoughts. Saunders tells her students to think,
"I am an awesome
communicator!"
2. The Visual: Use your body, eye contact, gestures and facial expressions. Smile.
3. The Voice: Work on volume, tempo, projection, articulation, pronunciation, vitality and pitch variety.
4. The Content: Organize and focus your words and information.
Truth is that how you say something is more important than what you actually say.
UCLA released a study by Albert Merhabian, who asked respondents what they remembered most about a presentation they watched. The results?
1. Visual had 55% impact
2. Vocal had 38% impact
3. Content had only 7% impact
"People listen to people they like to listen to, that they like to see," says Kahrs.
Secret #4: Banish fear
There are a few routes to fix your fear. Kahrs suggests three steps:
1. Realize you're not a freak for freaking out before a speech; most people list public speaking as their number one fear.
2. Recognize it's not a big deal if you make a mistake. “Your presentation in fifth period will be forgotten. Sorry! There's not as much at stake as you think,” Kahrs says.
3. "Learn how to 'let the steam out of the pot.' Learn to use your adrenaline surge and your nervous energy productively."
Saunders suggests using two approaches. First, instead of focusing on personal shortcomings, turn attention to your audience. "Get past the point of worrying about, ‘Oh, will they like me?’ and your mindset is more, ‘Oh, I can't wait to share this information with this audience because I know I have something that is going to help them and I know what I’m talking about."
Author of the motivational book You Are the Music, Saunders also uses a musical metaphor to tackle fear.
"If you're playing the piano, you buy a piano and you go buy the music books. But of course if you have the piano and the books, you're not going to learn to play the piano unless you practice. So once you have the desire [to improve one's speaking skills] and … the tools, then practice, practice, practice,"
she says.
Jeffreys advises, "Think of yourself as not talking to a group of individuals but think in terms of speaking to individuals in a group." In other words, when you're giving a presentation, imagine you're simply talking to a friend at lunch. Few people lapse into phobic convulsions over conversations with a classmate.
Secret #5: Be passionate
"You've got to speak from your own experience. You have to speak from the heart," says Jeffreys. "Take a stand. You have to have a real argument ... [and] take a side--that's what counts.
It's not about giving out facts. People respond to emotion; they don’t respond to just intellectual data dumps."
Let enthusiasm fuel your ideas. "Ideas have to have kind of a life of their own. They've gotta have a tune...a beat...a melody, they've gotta have something that is going to stir the emotions rather than simply the intellect," says Jeffreys. "You know what it's like when you just come back from a trip or you went to a concert that was fantastic and you’re excited about it? That's the kind of enthusiasm you have to bring to a speech in order to get people to not turn you off."
Secret #6: Focus
Be articulate. "We are living in a fast-paced age where people don't what to sit around and listen to someone [saying] 'uh,' 'um,' 'you know,' 'you know what I’m saying?,' 'I mean,' 'like...' They want you to get right to the point because they don’t have time," explains Saunders.
"Decide what is important," says Jeffreys. "[Then] hit 'em hard. Hit 'em over and over again. Cut out all the waste. Find out what the main point is and hit it over and over again."
With this approach, your audience will share your focus and come away with some valuable information. Remember, your ultimate goal as a public speaker is simply "to get your ideas across to affect other peoples' lives," Saunders says.
Secret #7: Confidence is key
Public speaking enhances your own life too. Why? You become confident. With a positive self image, you develop leadership skills, self esteem, sincerity, listening skills, one-on-one interaction, decision-making abilities and motivation. You are persuasive. You might even take on new challenges.
"Confidence is a foundational quality that sets the stage for achievement," says Triana Rutherford, Operations and Training Manager for Dale Carnegie Training in Vancouver, British Columbia.
Secret #8: Practice makes [almost] perfect
The more you practice, the more confident you will become. "Then you start to feel more comfortable and start thinking you’re Justin Timberlake or Britney Spears and 'Hey, this is great! Everybody loves me, this is fun!'" says Kahrs.
Practice opportunities are plentiful, even in high school. Some ideas to check out, according to Anita Zinsmeister, president of Success Unlimited, Inc. in Cherry Hill, NJ, are:
• Electives such as Speech or
Communications class
• Student government, especially
if you step into a leadership
position
• Sports, including giving speech-
es at awards banquets or
encouraging the players
• Radio or TV station, volunteer
to be a DJ, an interviewer or
reporter
• Debate club
For the college-bound, take a public speaking course. "Everyone should take a course in public speaking, regardless of major–make it be their number one elective," Saunders encourages.
While you're adding electives, consider a psychology course. "It helps to know how people think [and] how the mind works so that you know how to create presentations that have the maximum impact," Jeffreys says.
