How to avoid a horror roommate!

Those roommate horror stories you’ve heard don’t have to happen to you. Instead, try these tips that I have compiled to help you get through four years of residence-hall life.

Communication is key. If you have a problem, speak up about it. Communication doesn’t mean leaving your roommate a Post-It Note when you’re upset. You both need to sit down and talk your problems through. This helps you avoid the problem of your roommate finding out about it through friends or suitemates. Remember, your resident advisors, or RAs, will be trained as mediators. They will be more than happy to sit in on discussions if you need them.

Sometimes it’s helpful to think about what exactly the problems are that you’re having with your roommate and to write a list for your own benefit. This will help you organize your thoughts and present them tactfully.

When living with a roommate, it’s absolutely essential to develop some house rules. These can include guidelines about quiet time, cleanliness or borrowing each other’s things. Laying down guidelines right away can drastically improve your living situation.

Be considerate. Consideration for each other means respecting the other person’s self, space and belongings. You will be expected to live in cramped quarters for many months, so it’s crucial for you to abide by the Golden Rule. We all know it: Treat others as you would have them treat you. If you give respect, you will receive respect in return. Try to be especially alert to each other’s need for space and quiet time. Understand, however, that sometimes people may not even be aware of things they do to bug you and vice versa. For example, a person might have a nervous habit of tapping a pencil while they read. She might be oblivious to it, while it drives her roommate crazy. Communicate with each other about how you can show consideration and respect.

Study time is of extreme importance. After all, you are in college to get an education. It is imperative to have quiet time for studying. You and your roommate should schedule times that work for both of you, or a time when only one person is in the room so there are no distractions.

Keep your room clean. Your room is your home for nine months of the year. It’s not fun to live in a dirty one. Make a list of chores, and split them evenly. Make sure you always do your dishes and keep your belongings neat. Your roommate should do the same.

Know when it’s OK to share. Borrowing is often a topic that causes problems. It’s a key issue that needs to be discussed on the first day you move in. Roommates need to let each other know what’s okay to borrow and what’s off limits. This includes food, clothing, books and CDs.

Learn to compromise. You must learn to compromise if you are to last a week in your room. If you are used to getting your own way, successfully living with a roommate may be one of your most challenging experiences in college. We all have ideas of what’s fair, so you must be able to give some leeway on an issue you see as important. But also stick up for yourself and let your roommate know what you are thinking. Learn to be a good negotiator so you can bargain an agreement you can both live with.

Living with someone isn’t easy at any age. When you keep these simple tips in mind, though, college living can be fun.

Gabrielle Wilson, 21, is a junior communications major at DeSales University in Center Valley, Penn. Her hometown is Wilmington, Del.

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