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Beating the odds

According to statisticians, one in every 330 children in the United States develops cancer before the age of 19.

I got it twice.

After losing my eye to cancer as a child, I never quite felt like a whole person. Sometimes people would even be so bold as to ask what was wrong with my eye. While I knew they meant no harm, the emotional torment lingered nonetheless. Was it not enough that I was visually impaired and had to go through such physical hardship? Why did I now have to endure endless teasing from those around me? All I wanted was to conceal the wound, but society would not let me forget.

The world, it seemed, was looking down on me and judging me for circumstances that were beyond my control. I decided to prove to myself that I was just as capable as any other child my age. When I got to high school, I worked to the best of my ability to get good grades, get involved and build up my self-confidence. I found friends who accepted me for who I was and things were finally coming together nicely.

I was optimistic for a bright future, but somehow I managed to step on misfortune’s toe yet again. I was diagnosed during my junior year with yet another cancer, Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. I did not want to believe it; the odds were just too slim. Even I could not be that unlucky, I thought. After surviving my first battle with cancer, I always thought that I had been given a second chance and that somehow that meant I had to do something exceptional with my life.

When I got to the end of my journey, I wanted to be able to look back and see that the road I had taken was only made possible by these hardships, somehow giving them a deeper meaning and purpose. I had always thought the way to do this was to spend all my time studying and preparing for my future. But upon getting the latest life-threatening news, I wondered why I had pushed myself so hard when my life could come to an end even before I even reached college.

This has been something I have always struggled with. Do I sacrifice my present for a better future? Or do I sacrifice my future for a better present?

I understand now that life is about finding a balance, about being content with the present while still preparing for the future. I had spent so much of my high school career stressing over deciding who I wanted to be and how to get there that I forgot to be content with who I was. I do not know why bad things have to happen. I only know that it is what we get out of these experiences that teach us to become more appreciative of life itself. 

Sometimes it takes incredible misfortune to draw people away from the trivial things over which most choose to fret. It is hard being sick, going through chemotherapy treatments and putting my life on hold while I recover, but I defeated cancer once, and there is no doubt in my mind that I can do it again.

Cancer attacked my body but failed in attacking my spirit. I am now more determined than ever to go to college and live each day to its very fullest. I eagerly anticipate every new experience and challenge that is in store for me. 

Jessica Glago, a student at Charles F. Brush High School in Ohio, was paid $100 for this article! Do you have a story to share? Send it to our Teen Writing Contest at www.nextSTEPmagazine.com/writing for your chance to win $$!

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